Inabilty to Communicate within the Martial Relationship
In some long term marriages an individual may believe that their spouse no longer understands them. The partner will complain of a severe lack of communication involving their children, work, or home lives. Some couples even report losing interest in activities that they used to find enjoyable to do together. It has been reported 12% of couples who seek marriage therapy feel alone and feel as if they can not confide in their partner anymore. Without open communication the marriage and the family will suffer.
Some partners even expect their spouse to have the ability to read their mind. This expectation is very unhealthy and stems from the belief that a married couple should know everything about each others needs and desires. The longer two people are together the better they know one another, however, reading each other’s mind is an unreasonable expectation. The concept of mind reading often appears in the situation where a couple exchanges gifts. For example if a wife is constantly disappointed by her husband’s gifts she blames him for not understanding her desires or not caring about her. Because if he truly “loved” her he would know exactly what present she was expecting.
Some spouses expect their partner to give them constant praise throughout the day. When they are denied this praise marital conflict occurs. Communication difficulties arise around many areas including but not limited to overspending, financial matters, outside friendships, infidelity, online addiction, online infidelity, substance abuse, and parenting concerns. A spouse who spends most of their time at work can often lose the ability to communicate with his or her family. Marriage counseling helps couples rebuild trust and open communication.